Im regret to let you know me.

my attitude based on how you treat me.
how long could i ignore this feeling ?
how long im gonna pretend ? 
how long i should wait until you realise ?
how long time you'll take to understand me ?
how long you'll always gonna treat me like that ?


ya, i did telling all the things on you. i didnt get it you'll change in one day but then it start again. im being tired to told you everyday with your attitude. 


silence doesnt mean i dont care anymore but how you gonna know me in this way ? with your ego and sensitively feeling ? i realise that i cant changing that because it is you permanent attitude. what i should do then ? you told me to help you change all that but how im gonna help you with this condition. it is hurting me day by day. when i tried to make it right it seems nothing could be better anymore. its like showing me the ending of all this.


 i've been tired and sick with those things happen to us. im not gonna pretend to you and big apology if  my real attitude showed up to you make you hurt. to lied for the person i love was a badly thing to let it happen on you. 
for being pretend.
laughing when you make a joke with a fake faces on me.
show to you that im really fine.just want to see your smile.
to make us keep together.
i didnt realise that what i do this was badly hurt myself.
for saying "im okey" and you just gonna say "really love me" , "take care then" and then thats it. those words was nice to hear but it is didnt even make me feel better.
for giving me second chance but without giving a trust on me again could ruin everything. 
what hurt me so much when you believe what did other people say without asking me ? and that way make me feel that you not really get into me. i hate the people who saying the things that actually wrong but,when i think back the more i hate myself  for losing you trusted on me. 


its so complicated now. for a long time i ignore my feeling that I AM CRAZY MISSING YOU! its really worst feeling to hide. til now i feel EMPTY. you know why ? because im too much HURT. this is crazy. what else i can do is just let it happen because i believe everything happen with reason,may this not the end but it is just my illusion to make it start back :( cause everything has change with us. surely it couldnt again. i am regret with all this! 


may he have a good life and may god always bless him. 
it is badly to say "goodbye" then i would say " take care" :(




till then. elle.

My laughter.

They make my life complete.
imissilove.          
mostly i NEED you all cause u all the BESTIES in my HEART. no matter what no one could make me laugh til i cry just like what  you all comfort me with all you joke and funny action.to have a friendship like you all was the greatest gift from god i ever had. i really appreciate  to have a good relationship with you all. my day full of our laughter even sometimes it is look crazy but its enjoyable laughing til cant breath. :)


share is caring :)
to remember all the things we all have thru before was a great story for talked about it. 
to share our happiness. sadness. its really help me to change all the bad things that i shouldnt do.
all you advices mostly change my life this year.


Fighting.

its totaly bad and worst things to happen cause it is shouldnt happen to us. we all have growing up and sure we can handle and settle in positively way.

its so good to have you all around and surely i will miss you all when we all have our own life,and yet i wouldnt never erase you all from my heart cause till the end we all are bestfriends ever even time change, life change no one could change the precious memory we all have thru together.


May god blesses our friendship forever.ILY :)


till then.elle.

feel GOOD!

Giving my Best :)
it is was super awesome! great time to spend with my sista and also with becka.(always gonna be) the GMB concert was really fun! i woludnt never feel regret for coming. Bam samsons was really sporting and happening.  . i was just stand near the stage and  i was really excited to watch Bam performing. its enjoyable for sing to worship LORD. 


GOD is good, always and forever.


till then. elle.

thats suit to called BITCH.

that girl. memang bikin panas.

well it was like this. the girl was joining the guy played "kayos" something like kicking each other but it is just for fun til then ne prmpuan kena hit by one guy apa lagi panas la dia. by that, dia start mengamukla kegilaan btul ne but yg bikin sakit hati ne suddenly dia slap that guy punyalaaa.. woi ! btul la xsdar diri ne prmpuan. its her fault tau sudah tu mainan lelaki yg dia menyibuk mau turut serta tu knpa ?? mau2 kna take attention ka ?? odoii punya sandii ko pompuan. after that senang2 lagi dia suru tu lelaki minta sory sama dia ?? tebalnyerrr muka awak. tak tau malu skit pun adehh. sampai bengkak ba mulut tu lelaki , punya asi ne pompuan. WISH! u get the reward twice than what u have done. 

20102010 nice day huh? 

till then. elle.

what's going on?

there's a change on me.

why its gonna be like this way. i dont what it but everything i felt , i cant ignore it. im not gonna be pretending thats everything was fine, i wont lie to him but to let him to know the truth really badly hurt him. i know he might think that i was getting bored with him, he might think that i didnt love him anymore. he might think that i was played him. ohh no, this is not because of that but if i try to explain to him .. he's not gonna understand with it. i know it is suddenly but really i dont know what's wrong with all this. i think , i really have losing my mind to hurt the one that i love, the one that i know loving me so much, i told him that i was scared to really get into the promises in the relationship we had this, is not because im just keep him as my toy but this is because i know when we made a promise then we both could hope and wish too much for this love. i dont want that be, cause i know that could hurt our heart too much.how if someday me or him doing a mistake but we have promise to not do it but it happen ? of course it will badly hurt. huu i never knew thats it could be so complicated like this. 

till then, elle.